“So often, children are punished for being human. Children are not allowed to have grumpy moods, bad days, disrespectful tones, or bad attitudes, yet we adults have them all the time! We think if we don't nip it in the bud, it will escalate and we will lose control. Let go of that unfounded fear and give your child permission to be human. We all have days like that. None of us are perfect, and we must stop holding our children to a higher standard of perfection than we can attain ourselves.” - Rebecca Eanes
You’re having a day with your children and one of them turns around and says:
“Mummy, I’m not feeling to great right now. I’d like to go upstairs and have some relax time”
You then watch them go upstairs and take some time out.
Later on they say, “Mummy, I’d like you to sit and cuddle me”
So you sit together and have cuddles.
That morning they had a meltdown and you later ask why? They respond with “I don’t like the fact you always get baby sister ready first and you carry her down the stairs before me. I want to be the leader!”
You have a relationship with your child where they can communicate their needs to you.
There’s more empathy.
You connect on a deeper level because you understand their wants and needs.
Your child feels less frustrated because they feel seen and heard.
There’s less frequent emotional outbursts because your child learns to self regulate.
You feel less stressed because you also understand the feelings behind the outward behaviour.
And there’s just more peace and harmony in the home.