LIFE OF A STAY AT HOME MUM
Today I've been thinking about my life as a stay at home mum and how I get through each day looking after a 17 month old with a second baby on the way.
I never envisioned I would be a stay at home mum in my late twenties, in fact I was never a forward thinker when I was younger so I didn't actually think ahead about anything to do with career, marriage, children all I knew was that all three would happen to me.
This week I've been digging deeper into blueprints (something Guru Tony Robbins talks about often) and subconsciously I believe my blueprint was always to stay at home and raise kids myself. My mum looked after me and my older brother when we were smaller and I only remember her having part time jobs. She was always there for me and I don't ever remember being away from her for long periods of time. I guess this rubbed of onto me and is one reason why I did consciously make the decision to stay at home to look after my daughter.
I'm the happiest and most content I have been. Since becoming a mum I feel more confident, more emotionally balanced, connected, present and I just really enjoying living day to day life. Counting my blessings and expressing the utmost gratitude helps keep me focused on my main goal of raising my daughter.
It can be a mind battle at times as I still have deep desires to be a successful business woman and often day dream about my vision board and all I want to accomplish. I want to believe that I can have my cake and eat it by doing it all (which I'm sure I can) without sacrificing my time that I get to spend raising my daughter.
Society today portrays that it's either one path or another (basically stay at home or go to work) but I do believe over these next 10 years there will be a shift of women who do run their own businesses whilst raising kids as i'm sure there's a mass movement of them already (just not many in my close circles).
Sometimes people ask me what I do and how I have patience to look after my daughter all day and the answer is I just learn. It's no different to people learning to tolerate their manager in work, or having that patience with a client in work, I just spend my time channeling my energy to my daughter, learning about her and myself and how we can work together by understanding her personality and how to best suit her needs.
I see being a stay at home mum as the perfect opportunity to grow and develop myself, work on the grey areas and strive to be a better version of myself. In my early twenties I didn't care for personal development or growth and I would constantly run away or put a plaster over stressful and difficult times. I would mainly use alcohol as an escapism and would often let feelings rule my life. I'm proud that through the journey of motherhood I've been able to over come a lot of prior demons by facing up to stuff and doing the inner work to become a more centered, balanced individual.
Sometimes what we strive for doesn't always make us happy which is something I've quickly learnt. You often hear successful people say money doesn't buy happiness and given I'm the happiest I've ever been and my bank balance is the lowest it's ever been I can soundly say I agree with them.
I know seasons are temporary which is why being deeply present and grateful whilst in them is key. I know my time will come to bust a gut for success and also for financial abundance and the time will come when my daughter won't need me like she does now.
One book which has been pivotal to my growth as a mum is by Dr Shefali Tsbary. I started with reading the Conscious Parent and then followed with The Awakened Family: A revolution in parenting. These books have been game changers and will no doubt be books I revisit yearly. It is so amazing understanding how our ego comes into play when raising children and how often we project our insecurities, wants and desires onto our children - consciously or subconsciously and subsequently stop them from evolving into their truest form and potential. If I can afford to buy this book for all the mamas I know - I would, I 100% recommend this to everyone I know. I've dropped the link above for anyone who wants to do any further reading.
I'd love to hear from any other stay at home mums (or previous stay at home mums) as I feel the community is small and it's lovely to know there are others out there.